Mills and Boon Man

It has occured to me that I talk a lot about my boy, but today, I just can't help it. Today I just want to shout from the roof tops!

Sometimes, he drives me up the wall. I wish he was one of those demostrative guys, the kind who do sweet things on a regular basis, or sends flowers. You know the type. TV boys. Mills and Boon men, if you will.

He's not.

When I ask him about it, he always says that he just doesn't have time for stuff like that, and flowers die anyway. (So few boys really understand the power of flowers. that's another blog altogether!)

Today, he had the day off. Yesterday was Australia day, a public holiday here. It was a Thursday this year (it's always the 26th of January) so for most of us, it was back to work today. Not for my boy - he managed to wangle a day off, and so has a 4 day weekend. I asked him last night, as we were eating out Thai take out (so so good) if he would please do the dishes. He said he'd do them for me today.

I got home from work, and boy, had he done them. Washed them. Put them away. cleaned my kitchen sink and benches. made my bed. tidied my bedroom a little. And, he took my car, got the air con gases filled up, and arranged for it to get a cut and polish this weekend. Is he good or what?!

Maybe I don't get flowers, but the next time I'm complaining about how he never does anything for me, please remind me of this post! Flowers, schmowers. I'm gonna have a shiny shiny car again!

peer pressure

I think I'm driving boy nuts!

And it's all because my friends are settling down. And fast! They've been together much less than boy and I, and have moved in together and are playing happy families. My boy and I are not. and it kills me. I want that for us. I want to come home to him at night. I want to see him every morning. he says that he won't leave his mum's until he buys a place. and that he won't buy something small, and that he won't buy something old. and that he won't compromise. so really, he is saying he wants to build. which is pricey pricey. so I had a bit of a tizz at him, about when it would ever happen. if ever. i'm so impatient sometimes.

My friend J says that its just that I know what I want, so I go and get it. its gotten me where I am, and its just who I am. but with this whole relationship thing, its not just about me. learning to compromise is a good lesson.

My boy has figured me out though. he knows me. really knows me. knows when to not make a big deal out of my latest tizz, and just take me for a walk, and when to make me talk about it.

I'm so damn lucky, and I think I forget that sometimes. When am I ever going to realise what I really have in him??

He and I had a lovely day on Sunday, and I think if I relaxed and stopped worrying, we'd do that more. but I stress and worry, and I make life so difficult.

Water fights under the hose (i lost. BADLY. note to self - hose defeats water pistol everytime. next time, get the hose, brainiac!) and smooches, cuddles even when its boiling hot, he stays at my place 5 times more often than I stay at his, and he never complains. I feel like I do a lot. but maybe thats because I try to express everything with him. He doesn't say much, I say everything. it eats away at me if I don't, and that is bad bad bad. it will end in tears and disaster.

Patient man that one. I have a lot to learn. he may drive me nuts, but I love him, and i love his way. even when he's late everywhere, and never lets anything faze him. I think I wanna be like him. Mayeb we can bothe teach each other a few things.

I'm so lucky to have him.

and he's lucky to have me - he'd never ever be on time otherwise!

Blog Personality

I was thinking last night about what to blog next. And that got me to thinking about my blogging personality.

The thing is, I'm having trouble getting my own personality into my blog. I think I need some advice. If you're reading and you have advice for me, de-lurk and help!

The thing is, I have a pretty wicked sense of humour most of the time. Fairly dry, often sarcastic, and (i'd like to think) pretty quick! but, I don't seem to have any of that on my blog. I'm pretty sure that I sound boring, and i hate that. I want to sound like my life is right now - nothing out of the ordinary, but I love it! I'm having a great time now, and I don't think my blog sounds like that. I've thought about trying to put some of the conversations I have into my blog, but I think that often they are 'you had to be there' moments, and I really don't wanna sound like a total try-hard.

Maybe its because I blog at work (at lunchtime, or before or after the day) and I'm not entirely thrilled with my job right now. I'm having a minor career crisis, but I'm pretty sure it will pass soon enough. I'm just not sure about stuff. I don't want to say anything more than that just yet, and thats for a few reasons. Firstly, in case my boss comes across this and flips out. Second, because saying it out loud (or blogging it) makes it real, and means I have to think about it. I just don't wanna think about it. It makes my brain hurt, and maybe my heart a bit too.

I'm not sure, but I'll keep you posted.

In the mean time, my boy is excellent, and I find myself smiling as I start typing about him. He's just making me so damn happy right now. god I'm lucky. I'm starting to think that maybe he is it for me. really. he drives me mental, and sometimes I just wish I was with a lawyer or doctor or something, but he's lovely, and I can live with words like 'brang'. because that's him. he's rough around the edges, and I'm a little less normal than even my friends and family realise. He knows, and he loves me anyway. Maybe even because of it.

Lucky Lucky girl.

oops - long time no news

i just realised that it has been about a week since i posted. maybe more.

but then I realised that I don't think anyone actually reads my blog yet, so it doesn't actually matter!

I've been thinking a lot lately. No, really! Thinking about whether I really like my job. whether I like this town. whether my boy and I will stay together. whether i like my life.

not sure what the answers are, but heres what I've got so far.

my boy makes me happy, and I make him happy, so we'll just trust in the gods and see what happens.

and the rest... don't know. not even sure if I'm ready to say it all out loud yet.

decisions, decisions.

Boo Hiss... but yay!

Holidays Suck.

Well, actually, it is just the end of holidays that suck. Today is Monday, and tomorrow is my first day back at work after the Christmas break. I just don't wanna go! I have spent the past week camping with boy. We just lounged at the river, and skiied a little.

Lots of tension though in the last few days. We had spent 5 and a half days in peace. Lounging, eating, drinking, skiing, off to bed when we felt like it, and just generally relaxing. everyone got along, and life was good. then my ex (who is a good friend of all of ours, and in a roundabout way is how I met boy!) turned up with his girl and some friends. It just turned to crap. They refused to use their vehicle to help us out, and they just made us all feel yuckky.

I just wish they hadn't come along at all. We were having such a peaceful time, and they just ruined it. I felt cheated I supposed. Like they had cheated me of the last few days of relaxing, and had tainted the memory of the whole break. Boo Hiss to them.

But, on the positive side, boy and I had lots of time together, and he was the sweet boy he used to be. Before we both started stressing about stuff. Yucky stuff, that makes us both tense in our own ways. He is starting to become the man in public that he has always been in private.

My friends are noticing the difference, and are commenting out loud. I think that is awesome. that means that he is opening up to them, and showing them why I am so nuts about him. For a while they couldn't work it out, because we are so very different, and he was this withdrawn, shy boy. But, now he is starting to be the smart-ass he has always been with me, and is getting better at doing those sweet things that he knows I love.

When we first got together, he used to send me an sms every day, to tell me something sweet. he doesn't do that anymore, I guess that is what happens when you settle into a relationship. But, last night when I messaged him to tell him that my house was making funny noises and that i was a bit spooked, he was so cute! lots of messages to make sure I was ok. he invited me over (he was already in bed by this stage) but I decided I wanted to stay where I was and slay my own dragons for the night. He was so sweet though, I'm a very lucky girl, really!

Anyways, I suppose I should get back to work now. I will try and post some more later this week.