the precipice

i'm getting more and more nervous about my new job.

I was supposed to be starting much later this year, but the other girl who was supposed to start ASAP bailed on the job. after she'd given them written acceptance. don't even get me started on how completely stupid i think she is. talk about burning bridges. holy crap.

she keeps e-mailing and texting me. but i'm kinda mad at her. i can't help it. she's put so many people out, and i find that really frustrating. plus, there were a lot of people who put a lot of time into helping her sort herself out. she kept telling us how she hated her job, so we encouraged her to apply for this new one, and we did everything we could. one girl spent literally hours on the phone to her, and we are all disappointed.

and i think i'm a little frightened. of the change, of the unknown.

see, whenever i tell someone about my new job, the eyebrows raise, they make that funny grunting noise. i'm sure that most of it is pure snobbery. i'm leaving private practice to join the government department. i won't earn as much in the long term. i won't ever become the big boss. i don't know that i really want to be that. certainly not at my age.

but its the precipice. i'm looking, and i'm scared!

News!

I am SOOOOOOOOOOOO excited! I quit my job! i am pumped, and slightly terrified all at once! I have got a new job, doing more of the bits that I love, and less of the bits that i don't, all for the government. Woohoo! I'm a public servant!
From what i've heard, the expectations in this job are so much more fabulous than my current job, and i just can't wait! plus, i'm going to be able to stop doing some of the truly crappy bits!
I'm slightly terrified, and that's a good sign i think. i think that it means that this is a decision that is frightening, and exciting. it also means that it is one i have had to think long and hard about.
really, i've been thinking for about 2 years, and waiting for this opportunity to come up again. i didn't do it last time, and i have regretted that for a long time. and now... i just want a start date, so that i can get on with it. plus, i want to try and get a 2 week break between jobs, and so i need to give notice as soon as i can.

ooh, and on the boy front... i think he might be thinking seriously about exciting questions. i hope so. i love this man so much, and i just want to be able to display that in some other way. to show it off more than i do. i want his name. i want him, all the time.