getting better

so, I was pretty upset about my work for a long while. it was just crap, my boss was being a total prat, and I was miserable. So I made a big decision, and decided that it was maybe time to head to the big smoke an try something new. I told Boy, and he was cool with it. Excited in his own way, and that was lovely.

now, my boss has gone and grown a brain, maybe he noticed how completely demoralised I was becoming, I don't know. In any case, he grew up.

And, in exciting, maybe I'm finally a grown up news, that it doesn't make a difference. Because, I am not just making this decision as a reaction to him. I am making this decision because it is important to boy (he's dying to get back to the big smoke, he lived there for 4 years) and because I think I need to push myself. Try something new. Challenge Myself.

My hometown will always be here. I will (assuming I handle leaving in the right way) be able to come back here. But, I will not always be able to go and try the big smoke.

I have no support network in the city like what I have here and that terrifies me. I think I would have gone over the edge without them this last few months. But, realistically, they'll head to the city soon, and more than being first to make the move, the idea of being one left behind is awful. terrible.

So, big decisions to be made. Big changes. I'll even do them without boy if that is what it takes.

Suggestions?? Ideas?? Comments?? Solutions to my nerves about this decision?? Please, I'm begging. Tell me I'm not insane.

Tell me I'll be ok.